EARTHQUAKE!!!!!!!!
At 01:00am on Wednesday, England was hit by an earthquake measuring 5.e on thre richter scale.
I was sat at the computer when the earthquake struck. Grit and stones fell down the chimney and at first I thought our chimney had been blown over by the gales we had been having. Then I realised that the wind had dropped.
Then the noise hit, it sounded like the next door neighbour's house was collapsing against ours.
Then I saw the walls shake, they moved so much.
I was so scared. I was shaking for ages afterwards.
A few of us on AIM were talking to each other about it. We worried together and supported each other.
It reminded me of the wonderful friendships formed here in blogland.
I want to thank everyone who asked anout my wellbeing.
Thank you so much for being there for me through a very scary time.
Wednesday 27 February 2008
Monday 25 February 2008
Gone
Anonymous said...
People. The finger pointing went even farther than you all think. Emails got sent around naming, not only SDock, and ppu, but others. I got one of the emails fowarded to me saying that you were all involved in some kind of trick or smear campaign because of when you were or weren't on the blog, who you talked to.... the game you were playing. It wasn't a nice email and not everyone believe it.... In fact most didn't. People got accused of being anonymous and of trying to frame others.
I know if I write this under my name it will get out who those emails got sent to and friendships would be destroyed but I feel I must put this here so everybody knows.... You are being judged because of who you talk to and what time you are on, and other things. I think the "watchers" you need to worry about are other 'family' members because they 'watch' you closely to see if you are part of some little 'gang' or something. I just wanted you to know. You know who you are.
February 24, 2008 10:09 PM
I never got this email so I can only presume that I was one of the people talked about.
I cannot do this anymore. Mayos used to be a place where I came to have some fun but now it has descended into name calling and finger pointing.
This place is becoming somewhere that makes me sad now. The whole computer thing, blogs, aim, emails, they all make me feel paranoid. I also end up reading to much into who hangs with who the most. I know that it means nothing mostly but I have mental health issues and feelings of inadequacy. It all stacks up and leaves me feeling like I am not wanted.
I have not only felt left out but have told people I have felt left out. Most of these people have been wonderful and gone out of their way to make me feel included and I thank you with all my heart. But.
Now it seems that the fact that I walk away from mayos when anonslaught starts because I don't want to be a part of the slagging, is being held against me. Sorry, but I do run away from the arguments cos I want nothing to do with them.
It also seems that an innocent game of eye spy which then morphed into hangman makes me guilty of something. I don't get it.
The stress is not worth it anymore.
I will not abandon friends and anyone who wants to email me will get a response. I love you guys, see you round maybe.
People. The finger pointing went even farther than you all think. Emails got sent around naming, not only SDock, and ppu, but others. I got one of the emails fowarded to me saying that you were all involved in some kind of trick or smear campaign because of when you were or weren't on the blog, who you talked to.... the game you were playing. It wasn't a nice email and not everyone believe it.... In fact most didn't. People got accused of being anonymous and of trying to frame others.
I know if I write this under my name it will get out who those emails got sent to and friendships would be destroyed but I feel I must put this here so everybody knows.... You are being judged because of who you talk to and what time you are on, and other things. I think the "watchers" you need to worry about are other 'family' members because they 'watch' you closely to see if you are part of some little 'gang' or something. I just wanted you to know. You know who you are.
February 24, 2008 10:09 PM
I never got this email so I can only presume that I was one of the people talked about.
I cannot do this anymore. Mayos used to be a place where I came to have some fun but now it has descended into name calling and finger pointing.
This place is becoming somewhere that makes me sad now. The whole computer thing, blogs, aim, emails, they all make me feel paranoid. I also end up reading to much into who hangs with who the most. I know that it means nothing mostly but I have mental health issues and feelings of inadequacy. It all stacks up and leaves me feeling like I am not wanted.
I have not only felt left out but have told people I have felt left out. Most of these people have been wonderful and gone out of their way to make me feel included and I thank you with all my heart. But.
Now it seems that the fact that I walk away from mayos when anonslaught starts because I don't want to be a part of the slagging, is being held against me. Sorry, but I do run away from the arguments cos I want nothing to do with them.
It also seems that an innocent game of eye spy which then morphed into hangman makes me guilty of something. I don't get it.
The stress is not worth it anymore.
I will not abandon friends and anyone who wants to email me will get a response. I love you guys, see you round maybe.
Week 9 "Come on you Spurs!"
COME ON YOU SPURS!
Well ladies and gentlemen, this week I will be walking around with the biggest grin on my face because my beloved spurs walloped Chelsea 2-1 to win the Carling Cup at Wembley on sunday afternoon.
It was fantastic, spurs played really well but against the run of play, Chelsea scored first. I was gobsmacked. In the second half, we got a penalty because one or their guys handballed in the penalty area. The brilliantly cool Dimitar Berbatov scored with the smoothest penalty I have ever seen.
The end result was 1-1 so the match had to go to extra time, we scored really early with a Johnathan Woodgate header. Then we managed to hold on to this lead to win.
I spent most of yesterday watching the news to see the pictures of our guys celebrating on the Wembley pitch. I am so excited, this win means that we have qualified to play in the Uefa cup again next year.
Our new manager Juande Ramos isn't called the cup king for nothing. He has won us the first available cup at his first attempt.
One of the best things about this cup run is the way that we thrashed our bitter rivals Arsenal 5-1 in the semi final.
Commiserations to Kass who is a Chelsea fan.
Well done lads, you truly are the pride of north London
Monday 18 February 2008
Week 8
Well, today my sis rang me from her work. This is the place where I have been doing some part time work to help them out as they are swamped.
I love the place and I love the people. I love being there and they have offered me some more hours.
If these hours were being offered as part of a permanent job, I would bite their arm off and accept. That way, I could sign off benefits and be a worker.
Unfortunately, this offer is to work as a helper, in the role I am doing now. I cannot accept the hours in this role as working more hours would mean I would get my benefits stopped and that is no good for work that is not permanent. At the moment, the hours I work are allowed and don't result in me getting any benefits stopped.
I am at a stage in my life now where I need to change.
I am existing, not living. I want to live. I know that living will mean working to earn money. I want to do this but I have no idea of the work I want to do.
Keeping normal working hours is hard becacuse of the noisy neighbour who keeps me awake till all hours and stops me from getting sleep. I don't follow a normal pattern, I end up being awake till about 6:00am then sleeping till the afternoon. This cannot keep on though, it has to change if I am gonna work.
Keeping this pattern has allowed me to hang with the wonderful people at mayos. Working regular hours would put an end to this and this is making me so sad to contemplate.
What do I do, a normal life or hanging with cyber friends?
I would miss you more than words can say but I think I need a life. I need to go places and meet people and earn money.
I want to meet people, I don't want to be alone all my life. I can't meet people if I don't go anywhere. I get so sad when I hear friends talk about having partners. This is a recent development but I want a partner too, I want to be loved.
Maybe this is my early mid-life crisis but I need to have a radical overhaul of my life.
I need to work, I need to go places and do things, I need to be more normal.
But that means less time with you guys and that kills me.
I can't live in the computer world and the real world as well. What do I do?
If I wasn't on the other side of the world to most of you guys, I would catch you but the timezones are a bitch.
I am so torn with my life right now. I wish someone would come along and take the choices out of my hands and tell me what to do.
Help!
I love the place and I love the people. I love being there and they have offered me some more hours.
If these hours were being offered as part of a permanent job, I would bite their arm off and accept. That way, I could sign off benefits and be a worker.
Unfortunately, this offer is to work as a helper, in the role I am doing now. I cannot accept the hours in this role as working more hours would mean I would get my benefits stopped and that is no good for work that is not permanent. At the moment, the hours I work are allowed and don't result in me getting any benefits stopped.
I am at a stage in my life now where I need to change.
I am existing, not living. I want to live. I know that living will mean working to earn money. I want to do this but I have no idea of the work I want to do.
Keeping normal working hours is hard becacuse of the noisy neighbour who keeps me awake till all hours and stops me from getting sleep. I don't follow a normal pattern, I end up being awake till about 6:00am then sleeping till the afternoon. This cannot keep on though, it has to change if I am gonna work.
Keeping this pattern has allowed me to hang with the wonderful people at mayos. Working regular hours would put an end to this and this is making me so sad to contemplate.
What do I do, a normal life or hanging with cyber friends?
I would miss you more than words can say but I think I need a life. I need to go places and meet people and earn money.
I want to meet people, I don't want to be alone all my life. I can't meet people if I don't go anywhere. I get so sad when I hear friends talk about having partners. This is a recent development but I want a partner too, I want to be loved.
Maybe this is my early mid-life crisis but I need to have a radical overhaul of my life.
I need to work, I need to go places and do things, I need to be more normal.
But that means less time with you guys and that kills me.
I can't live in the computer world and the real world as well. What do I do?
If I wasn't on the other side of the world to most of you guys, I would catch you but the timezones are a bitch.
I am so torn with my life right now. I wish someone would come along and take the choices out of my hands and tell me what to do.
Help!
Friday 15 February 2008
Week 7
Well, after fucking up, all you can do is apologise.
People either accept an apology or don't. You can only apologise so many times, after that it drains your soul and you have to walk away.
I am once again sorry, people make mistakes in life. I'm human, I fuck up.
That's all, I can't do this any more.
On a brighter note, thank you to all the wonderful people at mayos. I love you guys beyond words.
People either accept an apology or don't. You can only apologise so many times, after that it drains your soul and you have to walk away.
I am once again sorry, people make mistakes in life. I'm human, I fuck up.
That's all, I can't do this any more.
On a brighter note, thank you to all the wonderful people at mayos. I love you guys beyond words.
Tuesday 5 February 2008
Week 6 update
I went to PC world and they gave me some advice.
I have removed my Norton anti virus cos it is a bastard that slows stuff down apparently.
It seems to have helped and things are now running faster and loading properly but it's still not 100% maybe 90% I think that's the best I'm gonna get it at the mo though.
I think I can tentatively say that I am back.
I want to say thank you for all the messages and to tell you all that I have missed you all terribly too.
I want to say a big thank you to all the people who put Dominic on their pages. I have heard a little but not the whole story so I'm not sure how many of you did this and who you all are but I want to say that you are all amazing people and I love you all so much. I am truely touched by your kindness.
I have removed my Norton anti virus cos it is a bastard that slows stuff down apparently.
It seems to have helped and things are now running faster and loading properly but it's still not 100% maybe 90% I think that's the best I'm gonna get it at the mo though.
I think I can tentatively say that I am back.
I want to say thank you for all the messages and to tell you all that I have missed you all terribly too.
I want to say a big thank you to all the people who put Dominic on their pages. I have heard a little but not the whole story so I'm not sure how many of you did this and who you all are but I want to say that you are all amazing people and I love you all so much. I am truely touched by your kindness.
Monday 4 February 2008
Week 6
Damn, fuck and bugger bollocks.
I spent all day yesterday loading all my stuff back onto my computer. I had difficulties loading the broadband but managed eventually. I suppose that should have told me that something wasn't right.
After loading all my stuff and getting online, I managed to answer emails post a new blog and look up some websites.
Unfortunately, I am having difficulties loading pages and things are taking ages to come up after I click on the icons.
I have rung PC world and they say that I will have to take it back to the shop to see if the new hard drive is working ok.
I am soooooooooo pissed off. If it doesn't work right, I will have to go through this all over again. Arrange for it to be picked up and fixed and redelivered.
God knows when this will be sorted. I shall get myself off to PC world tomorrow. I hope they can help me there and then.
Please keep your fingers crossed for me.
I really do miss you all.
I spent all day yesterday loading all my stuff back onto my computer. I had difficulties loading the broadband but managed eventually. I suppose that should have told me that something wasn't right.
After loading all my stuff and getting online, I managed to answer emails post a new blog and look up some websites.
Unfortunately, I am having difficulties loading pages and things are taking ages to come up after I click on the icons.
I have rung PC world and they say that I will have to take it back to the shop to see if the new hard drive is working ok.
I am soooooooooo pissed off. If it doesn't work right, I will have to go through this all over again. Arrange for it to be picked up and fixed and redelivered.
God knows when this will be sorted. I shall get myself off to PC world tomorrow. I hope they can help me there and then.
Please keep your fingers crossed for me.
I really do miss you all.
Sunday 3 February 2008
Week 5
Well,
My computer was fixed. I had to have a new hard drive so I lost all my data. When it was delivered back to me they had put a new lid on cos my last one had a crack on it. I swore blind to the deliveryman that it wasn't mine, then I opened it and saw the fingerprint on the mouse left click where I had worn it away so I had to sheepishly acknowledge my mistake.
They sent me my old hard drive back so that I could have data recovery done. This however costs £100 which I wasn't happy about. I took the computer down to PC world and was told that it wasn't that damaged and I only needed data transfer which costs £30. At last, something going right with my computer.
It is sunday night as I write this. I am still reloading everything onto my computer. I hope to be with you all tomorrow. I am experiencing dificulting loading pages with pictures on. I hope this will be better in the morning.
I have missed you all so much and can't wait to get back to you all. It will have to wait till tomorrow though cos now I need to go in the bath and go to bed early as I didn't sleep well last night as I have a cold and can't breathe.
I love you all.
My computer was fixed. I had to have a new hard drive so I lost all my data. When it was delivered back to me they had put a new lid on cos my last one had a crack on it. I swore blind to the deliveryman that it wasn't mine, then I opened it and saw the fingerprint on the mouse left click where I had worn it away so I had to sheepishly acknowledge my mistake.
They sent me my old hard drive back so that I could have data recovery done. This however costs £100 which I wasn't happy about. I took the computer down to PC world and was told that it wasn't that damaged and I only needed data transfer which costs £30. At last, something going right with my computer.
It is sunday night as I write this. I am still reloading everything onto my computer. I hope to be with you all tomorrow. I am experiencing dificulting loading pages with pictures on. I hope this will be better in the morning.
I have missed you all so much and can't wait to get back to you all. It will have to wait till tomorrow though cos now I need to go in the bath and go to bed early as I didn't sleep well last night as I have a cold and can't breathe.
I love you all.
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